An Healthy approach in relationships

For a healthy and constructive approach in relationships it would be very helpful to ask which inner space I am moving from, which part of me is relating to the external event, which fragmented part of me is making the choice?

Often, almost always, our choices and decisions or the way we relate in relationships moves from the inner space of the wounded child, from an immature reaction movement.

Love Wounds

All of us live with love wounds from early life: abandonment, shame, disappointment, rejection, betrayal, humiliation, injustice, so we wear masks as a result, in order to reject the pain and not feel that particular wound.

Wanting to avoid that pain, however, leads us to a recurrent attitude in attracting in life, just like a magnet, those conditions that make us relive the wounds: co-workers, partners, friends with whom we create dysfunctional relationships and emotional dependency, which stimulate precisely what we need to look at, in order to have the opportunity to heal.

The First Step

Our inner child asks to be seen, he tends to take possession of our life, staging boycotting behaviours; the child has no other tools than that of going into reaction every time a repetition of the trauma occurs; he does not have enough inner space to contain and stay with that emotional intensity resulting from the link with the past.

The first step is to become aware of our wounds and the way they hinder the unfolding of an expanded life experience, full of love and satisfaction in the work as well as in couple relationships: at some level every conflict, block or non-expression of oneself and one’s talents has its roots in the wounds of love not looked at.

Ingredients for loving ourselves

Through ritual practices, individual and group meditations we will take care of ourselves, so we will have the ingredients to love ourselves and become aware of when and how our child wants to take the lead: observe him, give him attention, and the previously unreceived embrace will make him become our ally and show up in our lives with the power of play, innocence and enthusiasm; these will then be creative forces at our disposal.

The new expression

A new expression of us takes shape, as adults who know how to express their needs, define their boundaries, open their vulnerabilities in sharing, and free themselves from the limiting beliefs we have created to survive.

Strong and Centered

With this new self-awareness we will go out into the world making choices free from raw emotions such as guilt, anger, fear, and resentment; in other words, we will be driven by learning to love in a mature, strong, and centered way.

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